Travie McCoy

I’ve heard the song ‘Billionaire’ on the radio countless times.

I despise it.

I had no knowledge of Travie McCoy until I discovered who was behind this beautiful song that I’m sure people all over the world have stupidly grown to love.

Who doesn’t want to be a billionaire so freaking bad?! Etcetera, etceterah…  Oprah.

Yuck.  I am vexed.

Other songs from Travie McCoy’s CD, “Lazarus,” such as ‘After Midnight’ and ‘Akidagain’ are just as agonizing as ‘Billionaire.’

There is, however, one song called ‘Need You’ that I surprisingly actually slightly enjoy.

Even still, Trav, your rapping/singing talent is pretty nonexistent.

Why don’t you just run off into the sunset with your BFF, Bruno Mars, holding hands and singing how desperately both of you wish you could [but never will] be billionaires.


Kevin Rudolf

Kevin Rudolf became famous after his dud debut, stinker single, ‘Let it Rock,’ was released a couple of years back.

Recently he released his second album titled “To the Sky.”

It blows.

‘To the Sky’ features songs with Lil’ Wayne, Three 6 Mafia, and other dirty south artists.

No offense Kevin, but last time I checked you were whiter than Michael Jackson, so why you trying to be black, yo?! Seriously man, you have to do something about that.

As you so say in ‘What Do U Got,’ “don’t try to be someone you’re not…” Or get a tan and change your name, Rudolf!

On a brighter note, I do like one song from Kevin Rudolf’s first CD, titled ‘I Song.’

It’s almost a little TOO white, but it works.  Congratulations Kevin, out of 20+ however many songs you’ve recorded, you managed to sing one that’s half-decent.

I guess for this day-in-age, that’s actually saying a lot.


Estelle

So, after hearing the song ‘American Boy’ a billion times on the radio while driving and at other unwanted occasions, I decided I hated the song enough to find out what genius idiot came up with it.

First of all, to say the lyrics are annoying doesn’t do it justice.  “Take me on a trip…” blah, blah, blah “American boy, American boy…”  I really want to come kick you.

Second of all, does this girl Estelle sing with something inside her mouth? Seriously woman, open your freaking mouth when you sing!

And stop sounding so nasally.

Being the nice girl that I am, I decided the least I could do was give her a chance by listening to the rest of her CD.

That was a mistake. It all sounds the same…  What torture! The butt-facial expression that Estelle is making in her picture is EXACTLY the same face that I am making. right. now.

I couldn’t resist the opportunity to share my most-loved song from her CD, titled ‘Pretty Please (Love Me).’

I feel a bit sympathetic toward her seeing as she has to beg for love, but who would ever want to love someone who has such a big mouth yet doesn’t use it properly and persists on sounding this awful?

Estelle, here is a tip for you that’s commonly referred to as: the two finger rule. When you sing, open your mouth wide enough so to fit two fingers between your teeth.  Or you can put something else in there if you prefer.

In your favorite words, pretty please go back to wherever the heck you came from.


Switchfoot

Not too long ago Switchfoot released an album titled “Hello Hurricane.”

This band, which started off as a Christian rock band, has slowly been trying to move away from the Christian stereotype by saying that Christianity is a “faith, not a genre.”  They are striving to be known simply as a rock or alternative rock band.

I first became acquainted with Switchfoot after seeing the movie ‘A Walk to Remember’ several years back, which featured a significant amount of their songs.

Some of the songs on their new album such as ‘Mess of Me,’ ‘Free,’ and ‘Bullet Soul’ have shifted significantly from the soft style of music featured in previous albums, as they feature more drums and heavy guitar strumming.

Even still, other songs such as ‘Your Love is a Song,’ ‘Always,’ and ‘Enough to Let me Go’ feature the same passion found in the songs released several years ago in ‘A Walk to Remember.’

All in all, I think Switchfoot has done a good job growing as a band by adding different elements to their music, while at the same time keeping several characteristics for which they became famous.


Peanuts

This is definitely not a New Release NOR is it a New Discovery, but I love Charlie Brown and you can never go wrong with jazzy music.

Plus, everything out there really sucks lately and I’m rather tired of being a hater.

‘Linus and Lucy’ rule.

Enjoy the beat!


Bebel Gilberto

Although Bebel Gilberto was born in the United States, she is the daughter of João Gilberto, a famous Brazilian musician who is considered to be one of the pioneers of Bossa Nova (popular Brazilian music that derived from Samba).

Her uncle, Chico Buarque, is one of Brazil’s greatest Samba singer, songwriter and interpreter, and Bebel Gilberto’s mother, Miúcha, is also a Brazilian singer.

One would assume that the descendant of good musicians would be capable of producing music that is equally as great as what her family has composed and performed.  However, as demonstrated by Bebel Gilberto, this is not always the case.

She is so well-known that I never heard of her until researching for blog ideas.  Her 2009 album “All in One,” Bebel’s fourth album thus far, was so boring that I had no desire to investigate her previous three CDs.

Bebel Gilberto’s album features a combination of songs in Portuguese and English, which I believe is the root of the problem.  The song ‘The Real Thing’ demonstrates that a Brazilian with an accent should NEVER sing in English.

Her accent is so painful that I was almost too embarrassed to write about her, much less admit that I am Brazilian and thus, have something in common with this singer.

Unfortunately, the problem with her music goes much beyond her crappy English.  The majority of her songs are extremely slow and depressing, yet too annoying to help someone fall asleep.

The few songs that are more upbeat are characterized by a mixture of Bossa Nova, jazz, and trance; who in their right mind would ever believe that combining these distinct genres would result in good sounding music is definitely beyond me!!!

Bebel Gilberto should definitely have taken more lessons from her parents and uncle before EVER producing a CD.


Backstreet Boys

Believe it or not, the Backstreet Boys are STILL around, and you are not imagining this post!

A very long time ago when I was in middle school, I remember the BSB was one of my favorite bands and almost every girl in the world, including myself, thought they were the hottest guys ever…  Of course, back then the Backstreet Boys weren’t even in their 20s and that’s probably why they seemed so cool.

Last month they released a new album titled “This is Us” which is repulsively similar to the albums they released about 15 years ago.  There is nothing extremely wrong with the CD, except that the BSB are now in their 30s, which is, well, not so cool… Shouldn’t they now be called the Backstreet Men?!

If the Backstreet Boys had revamped their style to something more mature and featured less lovey-dovey, “I’ll never break your heart” type of content in their music, they would probably have a smaller hate club.

The song ‘Straight Through My Heart’ is exactly the type of song that a group of 30-year old men should NOT sing, but I suppose they are trying to bring the Jonas Brothers some competition…  If the BSB keep this up, however, the brothers will annihilate them!


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